Reality Steve


The “Bachelor” Colton – Episode 3 Recap, the Caelynn/Hannah B. Nonsense Going Nowhere, and Ep. #14 of the “He Said, She Said” Podcast with Ashley Spivey

Photo Credit: ABC

-The last group date was I’m guessing something that none of the 8 women wanted any part of. Bootcamp with Terry Crews and his wife? Seriously? Like, can’t we make cupcakes or something? Maybe go on a shopping spree? Or hey, can we play Duck, Duck, Goose again? That was much less taxing on the heart rate than sled pulling and tire flipping. The 8 women on this date were Catherine, Onyeka, Nina, Sydney, Caitlin, Nicole, Tayshia, and Cassie. Essentially these women were given workouts that a normal human cannot do. I’m not sure whose idea this was, but lets just say the women hated it. And how could you not? If Terry Crews is involved, it’s safe to say that you’re probably going to have to lift a sofa over your head and throw it 100 yards. Or something like that. Considering these women, all 100 lbs and size 2 of them are on this date, probably not the best date choice. Maybe next time we go for dress fittings or something. This is insanely cruel.

-During the workouts, we could see who goes to the gym and who’d rather date a guy named Jim. Nicole couldn’t do one pull up, and that was with Catherine hoisting her up from her ass. Catherine on the other hand tells us she took Jiu Jitsu at some point, and the way she attacked that punching bag, it certainly seemed like she knew her sh**. So she’s a bad ass DJ who’ll kick your ass at Jiu Jitsu if you touch her equipment. Got it. I’ll be sure to steer clear of her. They didn’t really show many of the other workouts except for Colton stretching Sydney, which could be considered soft porn in some states. Sydney being the former NY Knick dancer has the flexibility that most guys desire, and Colton saw it firsthand. I think she was able to turn her pelvis inside out so, ummmm, good for her? I’m sure Colton has no idea what to do with information like that. Cassie sure noticed that Colton lost his stretching virginity that day. Don’t worry, Cass. The Big V he’s still saving for you. I think.

-The competition begins and they only show us the women who either really struggled or dominated it. We see Onyeka easily pushing a 100lb wedding cake sled, while Nicole couldn’t move it if she had a tractor behind it. Catherine and Sydney can easily flip a tire, while Tayshia can’t pull a limo, but somehow Caitlin can. This basically means that Cassie and Nina were left in no man’s land since we didn’t see either of them do any of the activities. Onyeka, Catherine, and Sydney make the finals, which consists of carrying a 50 lb medicine ball up and back twice before placing it on a pillar. Onyeka wins and she’s the queen of the world. She dominated the “Bachelor Strongest Woman” competition and her prize is a full body workout with Terry Crews and his wife every day for the rest of her life. Congrats, Onyeka. We’ll see you at the 2020 Olympics. If Onyeka was hoping her prize was Colton, she’s sorely mistaken. That’s not much of a prize anyway.

-At the after party, you wonder what the whole point of the Caitlin dismissal was. It’s not like Caitlin had made a name for herself in the first two episodes and people were devastated/shocked/surprised he sent her home. Hell, I’m guessing most people didn’t even know her name until last night. So when she gets alone time with him, admits she doesn’t have a tragic backstory and just loves the way her life is going, I didn’t think it was overly dramatic that Colton sent her home. It was more like, “Ok, and the point of that was?” I say that because I’m guessing there’s more than just Caitlin there right now who Colton doesn’t see a future with. So basically they just her as a pawn to embarrass her publicly. I doubt she’ll see it that way, but yeah, that’s essentially what they did. They knew before the date happened that Colton was sending her home, hence how could they have a car service ready to go to come pick her up? Production knows who Colton is into and who he isn’t into. They knew, and they used that as an opportunity to try and create some drama by him sending someone home early, but it’s not anyone the audience was the least bit invested in, so I’m not sure it had the effect they were looking for.

-At this after party, we saw him kiss three women: Cassie, Tayshia, and Nicole with Cassie’s kiss and his subsequent talk about her being obvious who he’s most into. He says Cassie gives him butterflies, she’s cute, she’s sassy, and she makes him feel comfortable. So as long as they give us that little glimpse, it keeps Cassie on everyone’s radar. Although as you saw in the spoilers, she doesn’t get a group date rose all season, and only one 1-on-1. Nicole ended up getting this group date rose because, well, ummmm, he didn’t really say why did he? If he did, I wasn’t paying attention. At this point, knowing the pool party was coming and the Hannah B/Caelynn tsunami was headed our way, who got the group date rose and why on this date wasn’t really holding my interest. We know where his head is at right now, and Nicole getting a rose was unfortunately just filler.



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