Reality Steve

Reader Emails

“Reader Emails,” Your Responses to Yesterday’s Post, & My Thoughts on the Last 2 Nights Episodes

Photo Credit: ABC

Hi Steve… long time fan and I so appreciate how crazy this year must be for you to do your job. Anyone who complains should just be grateful for the diversion and entertainment you provide so well. And, with everything in this world no longer “normal”why should the Bachelorette be any different?

But this pandemic show has reached the height of silly. Rather than “adapt” honestly, it is more contrived than ever. What the hell do you need limos for? They don’t go straight to the airport, right? To get to their room? It is also obvious that they know the final 4 since those family members are likely already in quarantine at the resort. So all of these “quick and sudden” decisions/departures are manufactured to a script. And I really don’t think Tayshia is in love with any of them… I see connections, attraction, etc., but no “love” connection, so it really doesn’t matter who she chooses in the end… it will either end quickly or develop after the show. Then again, that’s usually the case, pandemic or not. Maybe it’s just easier to see it under these circumstances. Your thoughts?

Comment: My thoughts are why can’t you just be happy for Tayshia? Why can’t you support her? Why do you have to hate her so much? Just you saying she hasn’t developed a love connection and that it doesn’t matter who she chooses in the end it’ll just fail anyway just proves you hate her. Why don’t you just grow up?

Hi Steve,

Thanks for your spoilers and podcasts. They’re always something that I look forward to each week.

– How are your niece and nephew doing? I recall your nephew being one of Luca’s favorites and I know a while back you took your niece to a Taylor concert.
Speaking of which…Great. My niece is the definition of a 16 year old girl right now. My nephew is an 8th grade boy without a care in the world. Both play sports, both are excited for Christmas, and both think they’re uncle isn’t nearly as cool as they used to. Which I predicted years ago.

– Have you listened to evermore? If so, what songs have you enjoyed?

Thank you and Happy Holidays!

Comment: T Swift fans are gonna be mad at me for this, but I still have not listened to the full album yet. Ever since she released it I either keep forgetting or am too busy. I need to find the time to just play the whole album from beginning to end without any interruptions. With that said, I’ll go with the Olive Garden song.

Hi Steve,

I was a little confused about whether or not the men at the “Men Tell All” got to see the episodes that hadn’t aired yet (except for the most recent one, which Chris referred to as airing “tonight”) before filming this? For example when Bennett asked everyone what he’d specifically said that was condescending, I got the sense that most of the guys hadn’t seen the “gift” he gave “Young Noah” yet? Or basically anything he said over the last few episodes?? I don’t know if they sat them down in their hotel room and had them watch every episode the rest of the season up to the MTA. That would’ve been 5 or 6 episodes I believe. They certainly had the time to because they quarantined for a week, but I just don’t know if they did. But if they didn’t watch full episodes, I know they were made aware of things and probably, at the very least, watched clips.

I also thought the way Noah showed emotion and teared up at the end of the first half when he was sent home was telling. All Bennett did in the back of his limo was marvel about how he could possibly have possibly been rejected, which was exactly what I would have expected him to do.

Watching Bennett start to lose it at Noah during the Men Tell All, it struck me what’s at the core of his issue probably is. Underneath the Harvard degree and all the scarves and money, there’s not much there, and he senses that on some level. (I know some people find B attractive – I DO NOT!) And then Noah waltzes in, 10 years younger and looking like Blonde Elvis, full of charm and personality without needing the privilege or the scarves, etc. to be adored by the ladies. To make matters worse, Noah had Bennett’s number from Day 1 and could see through his act. (Did you catch his smirk when Bennett’s segment confessing his love to Tayshia was shown? Noah knew how cynical and absurd that was.)

Ultimately, Bennett had to push Noah down to make himself feel better. Classic insecurity. Anyway, I hate the term “D-bag” (which Bennett used first to describe himself, or his not-self), but I have to agree that he is one. Can you tell I’m not a fan?? If I saw Bennett in real life, I’d seriously run in the other direction.

Also, why has Claire gotten such a bad edit? Do you think the chicken eating blooper and her yelling at a prairie dog was really the best they could do? Come on, Bachelor, hasn’t she suffered enough? Lets be honest, the bloopers are seriously getting worse and worse every year.

Last but not least, do you think Noah will go on BIP?

Comment: I think we need to start changing the BIP questions from “will so-and-so go” to “will so-and-so get cast?” Because pretty much every single one of these people WOULD go. But not all of them can with four seasons for them to choose from next summer: Peter’s women, Tayshia’s men, Matt’s women, next Bachelorette’s men. There will be so many to choose from, there’s no way anyone will be able to say with any certainty who will be there until we get much, much closer to filming. Do you know how many contestants in the past I’ve heard from say they’ve “been reached out to about Paradise,” and then nothing ever happens? More than I can remember. There’s only a set amount of people that can make it, and with a bigger pool this season to choose from, they’re gonna have their pick of the litter.

Hey RS…I have to say, Ben has been steadily becoming a fan favorite and I don’t get it. He certainly has been through a lot and I applaud him for pulling himself out of a dark time (which he shouldn’t have been manipulated into sharing), but I don’t get the hype. I’m on tiktok a lot, and I see constant obsession over him and comparing him to Tyler C, especially from younger fans..maybe it’s from experience now but I think he comes off as clingy and insecure, not qualities in someone I, or a mature woman like Tayshia, want to date compared to the poise of the other top 3. Any idea if his edit improves in these final episodes? Would you say he is the top Bachelor contender from this season’s pool? No. I just don’t think our next Bachelor is coming from this group.

Another guy with a poor edit, Bennett. Yeah, he has NOT looked good, but people comparing him to Luke P / Chad / toxic villains in the past? Really?! This seems like much more of a story blown out of proportion than him being a consistently awful guy, would you agree? Also for fun, would you give worst overall bachelor nation villain on the show vs. in real life, if you think the answer would be different. I’m thinking it’s Chad on and off the show…Chad is in a league of his own. It’s him and no one’s close. No, I wouldn’t put Bennett in a “toxic” villain category either. He’s barely a villain at all. He’s just Chateau Benet…a guy with a very high opinion of who he is and refers to himself in the third person.

I know you’ve got limited info for the finale but one thing I haven’t seen mentioned is if anyone meets Tayshias family- do they come to La Quinta to meet 1 or 2 guys? Was thinking if they didn’t, that might be reason why she didn’t leave engaged. Yeah, not sure who they met.

Last thing, not bachelor related. Got super into Love Island this past summer first American season I watched. Listened to your podcast with Tre— I am shocked Cely and Johnny are still going strong. Wish you could have had more of the Love Island contestants on but heard there was some issue there with contracts, bummer!

Comment: I honestly haven’t kept up. So they’re still together? What about the winning couple, Caleb and Justine? Or Mackenzie and that one dude? Or Moira and Calvin? I have no idea.

Hi Steve,

I would like to start off of how shocked I am to hear that BEN (!!!!!) is sent home during hometown week. Is it at all possible we will see him as the next Bachelor and not just maybe on BIP? I would love to see someone who has overcome as much as he has find love and it think other Bachelor/ette fans will too (and because he’s super adorable and a nice guy (too many jerks as bachelors, ie: Bob, Jake, Juan Pablo, Chris Soules, etc.). By the time next summer rolls around and they’re deciding on the next Bachelor, and we have a new cast of men for the next “Bachelorette” to choose from, I don’t see Ben very much at the forefront.

My question is: how involved is production in the final 4? If the guys had to quarantine and take COVID tests for two weeks at the resort before filming, shouldn’t they have had the families and friends do the same with the same 2 weeks? If that is true, they would have fifty or so people there for no reason (and on whose dime?)? The guys didn’t quarantine for 2 weeks before they came on. It was around 7-9 days and 3 negative tests. Same went for the families, although I believe they were more like 5-7 days with 3 negative tests.

Lastly, Yosef is an ass and I thought once Clare and Dale had their final “good-bye” fictional “we didn’t know each other” with Chris Harrison, that we would be done. Such a waste to have class-less, finger licking Clare hogging the majority of the bloopers.

Keep it going, Steve, and happy holidays!

Comment: Facts don’t matter anymore. People’s own self truths. No point in even responding.

Another thing that has been a hot topic lately, is your website!! If people hate it so much, they can stop visiting it?? Why so much whining? However, you did say on the podcast if people had actual constructive feedback or things they would change you would listen. As a long time reader, who reads your site 90% on her desktop, I will say the ads are A LOT. I understand that’s how you make money off the site but when I’m looking on the site there are usually videos in both bottom hand corners, ads on the right side and ads embedded in the columns. Is there a way to only put it on the side? Or maybe it has something to do with the web browser? I also think links to relevant posts at the bottom may be easier to navigate than just the forward/backward buttons on the side (that take you to the previous post). For instance, when you have episode-by-episode spoilers in a “normal” season it can get hidden and so having a link to the most popular/useful posts on the bottom or side may be helpful. Lastly, is there a link to your podcasts on your home page? Or do you have to scroll to find the last podcast post? That could be helpful too. I hope this isn’t taken as hate, just things I would find beneficial!Ok, a lot to cover here and I’ll try to get to it all. But THANK YOU for actually coming at it from a constructive criticism range and actually explaining what exactly you have a problem with. Refreshing.

Well the fact that you read on desktop 90% is shocking. You’re definitely in the minority. 4 years ago, my traffic was 75/25% desktop vs mobile/tablet. Now it’s close to 80-85/15-20% mobile/tablet vs desktop. So yes, we are maximizing what we can on desktop to get the most out of it. Just recently, we had close to 5 or 6 ads running down the right hand column. Now we have one that just scrolls down as you scroll down the page.

Ads embedded in the columns you will find on any entertainment site. E!, ETOnline, US Weekly, People, etc. Any site worth a damn is running ads within their story. And multiple ones. If not videos as well.

The video ads on the in the bottom hand in both corners are high paying ads. I’d be an idiot to take those down. And, you can X out of them the second they pop up.

Your question about the links to relevant posts, I’m not sure what you mean. I’m confused by what you’re talking about. Also, the forward and back buttons on the side. Huh?

Episode-by-episode spoilers in a normal season will always be the first story once you click (for instance this season) “Bachelorette Spoilers – Season 16” which is in a big picture of Tayshia at the top of the site. Same goes for my Podcasts. There’s a picture 3 pics over from that Tayshia one I just mentioned that says “Podcasts.” You click on that and it’s every podcast in descending order from most recent. However, I’d never listen to the podcast on a desktop. Listen on your phone through any of the podcast streaming services. So much easier. Hope that helped.

Lastly, you mentioned on Olivia’s podcast your prediction for the CFB Playoff. I would say I agree with your prediction BUT if Notre Dame beats Clemson this weekend, who is your next team in? I grew up in an Ohio State household but went to Texas A&M so my family has a special interest this year! Oh and who would be your Heisman pick? I know Mac Jones is the frontrunner but how does he win the Heisman when he’s not even the best player on that offense?! It’s certainly been a crazy year with shortened schedules, last-minute matchups, and a shoe-throwing penalty…

Thanks for your time and content. I appreciate it!

Comment: If Notre Dame beats Clemson a second time, yeah, I gotta believe A&M is in. You can’t put Clemson there with 2 losses to the same team. And next in line would be A&M. So Aggie fans, you are the biggest Irish fans in the world this weekend since that’s your only chance of getting in. Well, I guess if Northwestern beats Ohio St. then they could get in as well.

For Heisman, man, there isn’t one dominant player like in years past. A few players putting up great stats, but not one dominant no-doubt-about-it guy this year. I think it’s between Mac Jones and Kyle Trask. And Trask really hurt his chances last week with that LSU loss. Guys on 2 loss teams usually just don’t win. So you’re probably look at Mac Jones if he wins and looks good this weekend. A QB has won it 17 of the last 20 years. So your odds are it’s going to one of those two.

Hi Steve,

Do you feel that Tayshia puts off the vibe of not being genuine/not that interested in these guys? When some of the guys got really deep and opened up to her, she would give off a look that made her seem she wasn’t there or not even listening to what they said. She didn’t provide a lot of emotional support in return to them sharing such heavy details, but of course this could have been edited out. Thoughts?

Comment: Why do you have such a problem with Tayshia? You clearly hate her if you think all those things. No, you’re not allowed to have a well thought out opinion of her based on what you see on TV. And really, I can tell by the way you wrote that, you’re being very passive aggressive towards her and basically racist. This is disgusting. You’re such a hater.

Hey Steve!

Hope you’re well and keeping safe in the US.

Couple of questions I’ve been thinking about.

Do the men at the Men Tell All know who the Bachelorette ends up with/how it ends prior to taping? I guess you’d have to ask them each individually.

Is it possible that Tayshia didn’t quarantine at the hotel for 7-14 days and just took a covid test and then started filming straight away? She definitely didn’t quarantine that long because we know when she got there and we know her first day of filming.

Do you know if they offered to Clare to come to the MTA or production weren’t interested? According to her tweet, she wasn’t asked.

Do production style and provide the dresses etc to the lead? And does the lead have a glam team (hair, make up)? Yes and yes.

What was the timeframe between the last rose ceremony and ‘hometowns’? Were all the families quarantining beforehand and then when Bennett, Noah Riley left so did their families? Or did she already know who the top 4 would be? I can’t say if Bennett, Noah, Riley, and Blake’s family were there quarantining, but my guess would be no. Tayshia knew her final 4 were. And knowing that filming never stopped, those families were brought in for 5-7 days beforehand. I highly doubt they brought in those other 4 families considering they know what’s going on and who Tayshia wants. Would be a waste.

Not really a question but to be honest Tayshia doesn’t really seem to be happy or madly in love with any of these men left. Or she doesn’t really know who/what she wants the final just doesn’t seem as obvious as some of the previous bachelor/ette’s.

Thanks Steve!

Comment: Soooo you hate her because why? Just because Clare got her love story you’re just gonna shit on Tayshia’s? Why are you such an asshole? She doesn’t care what you think anyway. She’s a queen.

Hey Steve,

I have a bit of random question for you, something that I was wondering about the other day.

You obviously know A LOT about this show. You have talked to countless contestants, you know a lot of what goes on behind scenes, and obviously have your sources so it’s safe to say that you really have a good sense of the Bachelor world. You’re not afraid to call out the reality TV of it all and I think most of us know that it’s reality TV and most of it is going to be edited and manipulated to create a story, but I know that some of us can’t help but fall for some of the storylines and love stories (guilty myself for Sean and for JoJo).

With that said, given everything that you know, have you ever watched a season, or have a specific couple that you felt while watching them that it wasn’t fake? Have you ever really bought into any of the love stories?

Thanks for all that you do!

Comment: Ashley and JP. And they lasted being married for 8 years with two kids. Because they divorced doesn’t mean what they had was fake. Not saying others that are still together are fake, those were just the first two that came to mind.

If any of your readers are still not convinced about just how much producers drive storylines and can do/say anything they want, I have a personal experience to share. In my early 20’s, Janet Jackson began hosting auditions across the country for a reality show she was going to put on for people who are triple threats (singer, dancer, actors). MTV was producing it, and I attended the audition in NYC. To make a long story short, I passed the first several rounds of auditions and made it into the final 12 people that were cast on the show. In preparation to live in a house together for the show, they made us all go on doctor’s visits, psychologist visits, etc. and they made us sign all kinds of contracts. One of them was literally like 80 pages long, and I read the ENTIRE thing because I wanted to be sure I knew what they could do to me or say about me if I went on the show. To give people an idea, these were some of the things in the contract:

– That producers can literally represent you ANY way they choose. They can use absolutely anything you say in ANY way they choose and you have no say in it. They can make you look a certain way or misrepresent anything you say/do.
-You have to dress how they say, do what they say, etc. or you risk “breaking” the contract and facing “consequences.”

-Since my contract was for a competition show with singing, dancing etc. it specifically said that they could give extra training or help to any contest if they chose to, basically to help them get ahead of the other contestants if they want. (I’m sure The Voice and American Idol, etc. do that as well.)

-It also said that no matter what the voting results were from the public, the producers could override it and choose whoever THEY wanted to stay on the show or go home. *THIS* – I think they do this with every single rose ceremony, and there’s not much Tayshia can do! They decide who they want to stay and they TELL her what to do. She has to do what they say.

There were a ton more things like this in the contract, but that should give readers an idea. They ended up canceling the show right before we were all flown out to L.A., which I was admittedly sad about at the time but I’m also grateful now in hindsight!

Anyway, thanks again for all you do!

P.S. My family also majorly LOVES Olive Garden. We’ve ordered it WAY too many times during these Covid months. Probably several times a month. It’s the BEST!!

Comment: Yeah, that’s basically what they Bachelor contract says in terms of how they can depict you. You have ZERO control over anything they want to do to you. It specifically says in the contract they can lie, manipulate, defame, and do anything they want to your character on the show and you have no legal recourse. So, as I’ve said a 1000 times, just know what you’re signing up for. A lot of perks can come from being on this show, but a lot of negatives as well.


I am watching the challenge and unfortunately can only access the 32nd season on.

I have a few questions if you don’t mind….

Why is Bananas such a threat? Because he’s won 6 times. Now 7. Nobody’s come close to winning that many titles. He’s the GOAT. Oops. Was that a spoiler?

What is up with Paulie? He seems like a total douche but I truly don’t remember him in the BB house. Maybe Kat can tell me why he was a douche in season 18? Google it. I never watched the season so I can’t speak on it, but I heard it wasn’t great.

Who are the greatest players in your opinion? Bananas, Evelyn, Cara Maria, are up there. Darrell, CT, and Derrick too.

Do they switch up the themes every season? Yes, but sometimes they have repeat themes.

Would you and Kat ever do the show? They’d never ask me. Kat would do it in a heart beat.

Love what you do and cannot believe people fault you for not having each season of the bachelorette/bachelor perfectly spoiled. Ugh

Comment: It’s ok. I blame their parents.

Hi Steve,

You might have already been emailed about this, but I am hoping you will address a post that was popular today on the Bachelor Reddit. They already hate you over there for no valid reason, but today this post claimed you are showing “racial undertones” towards Matt James. The OP, who received nearly 150 upvotes and 200 comments, said, “For RS to allude to the fact they they’re just trying to make him look good for social sake is so unsupportive and rude.” Please roast these people for being offended by you speaking the truth.

Thanks for all you do and for giving me something to look forward to reading every week.

Comment: Typical and what I fully expect from them. No need to address such nonsense from the echo chamber of negativity because it’s an effort in futility. If that’s what they think, nothing I say will change their mind. Let them think it. They’re a cesspool of garbage. Lets add that one in there too.


Thank you for doing what you do as always.

You mentioned about what the reason why Matt eliminated Heather in a short time after she joined. Your thought was because it wasn’t fair for other girls who have taken the the time knowing him or already in progress the relationship with him.

For me, so what…. remember Jillian Harris picked Ed as winner who joined later in her season. Didn’t Ed come on in night 1, just later on in the night with 4 other guys? I don’t think he came on later in the season. I know that he left and then came back towards the end. That definitely happened.

There are 2 reasons I feel he eliminated her:

1) it is for the show to create drama whatsoever OR
2) Matt is not the type to wait for sex until marriage. Far from it. Not even close it.

One last question: any scoop on which the last 4 girls in Matt’s season yet even you don’t know the winner? I highly doubt you know the winner at this point which is perfectly fine. I am anxiously eager to watch Abigail. Sound like she’s got a really good head on her shoulder. I also am hearing impaired as well. That is the only reason I will watch Matt’s season. I have shared the info of Abigail with deaf or hard of hearing folks and ASL/oral interpreters that I know who don’t watch the bachelor/bachelorette seasons. They expressed wanting to support her all the way! I am expecting a lot of fans in the deaf culture will watch her too. Wishing her the best on her fun but wild journey!

Comment: I know who 3 of the final 4 are. I’m waiting on the last one. And yeah, Abigail and the deaf community will get some major run this season. Good for them. Pretty much heard nothing but good things about her.

Send all links and emails to: To follow me on Twitter, it’s: Instagram name is “RealitySteve,” or join my Reality Steve Facebook Fan Page. Talk to you tomorrow.



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