Reality Steve

Reader Emails

“Reader Emails,” Last Night’s IG Live, & Chris Harrison Set to Speak

Photo Credit: ABC

A lot of stuff coming up as we’re down the home stretch of the “Bachelor” season with overnights on Monday and then the finale and ATFR on the 15th. We know Emmanuel Acho will be hosting, but we haven’t heard a word from Chris Harrison since his February 13th post on IG saying he was stepping aside for a period of time for the show. That will all change, allegedly tomorrow, when he sits down with Michael Strahan on GMA. It hasn’t been officially named which day he’ll be on, but that’s the rumor going around it’ll happen tomorrow. I think we know pretty much what Chris will say, but, seeing and hearing him say it will be quite interesting. And as Ashley and I discussed on the live last night, I think the fact this is happening seems to be step 1 to Chris’ rehab tour and I think this is a major step into him returning to the show at some point. I don’t know when, but, if the show was completely done with him forever, I don’t think this interview happens. That’s just the way I see it. But I think a lot of people will see what he has to say. I wonder if he doesn’t only address the Extra interview (and by the way, the first thing he should do is apologize to Rachel Lindsay), but also all the other problematic things he’s said in the past that have been brought to the forefront the last few weeks. I hope he doesn’t think the only thing he did wrong was the Rachel “Extra” interview.

Last night’s live was broken up into 2 parts in case you missed it. 90 minutes total, and we covered a lot. Enjoy…


_____________________

Hi Steve,

I’m glad to see that the Bachelor franchise is making some effort at being more racially diverse — and that after the latest debacle, they’re going to have to do more of this. I think it’s fantastic that there are so many BIPOC women on the show now.

But it’s hard for me to take this diversity all that seriously when I don’t see them showing diverse images of women. Are they ever going to have women who are more than a size 4 or 6, and who aren’t conventionally attractive? Will there ever be a contestant who wears glasses all the time, or has acne or imperfect teeth, or who chooses not to wear makeup? And are we ever going to have women that don’t fit this attractive, middle-American, “normal” mode? How about some girls who were unpopular in high school, who are Goth or Emo, who go to sci fi conventions, who are bisexual or pansexual or gender nonconforming, or who are otherwise alternative or unique or outside the norm? And, for that matter, are we ever going to see men who aren’t conventionally attractive and conventionally masculine? It’s been 41 seasons and we’ve seen none of that. So my guess would be no.

To me, there are two fundamental representation problems with the show — the lack of racial diversity, but also the misogyny. It’s misogynist to show such a narrow definition of what it means to be an attractive woman. I don’t see the show dealing with the misogyny any time soon, because it’s hardwired into the DNA of the show. If pressed, the producers would tell us that viewers don’t want to see different kinds of women — which is the same excuse they’ve given for keeping the show so white for long.

I suppose this is more of a comment than a question! But I’d love to hear your take on it. Is this show ever going to include women who don’t fit their current mold?

Comment: Here’s the thing: It’s not just this show. Just in the media and social media as well has portrayed what they believe to be an attractive woman. So yeah, it screws with a lot of people’s heads because an attractive woman to some might unattractive to others and vice versa. But for this show, I just don’t see it changing unfortunately. They are what they are at this point. If they can just barely touch the surface on racial diversity after 18 years, it certainly doesn’t seem like they’re anywhere close to casting people with “normal” body types and features.
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I must admit that watching this season is moot. We all know what has occurred, and what is happening outside the current season, is much more important. Do you think they should cancel the upcoming episodes and instead use the platform to promote education and healing using past and present POC and BIPOC contestants? Do you think the powers that be will ever do this?

Comment: They should but they won’t. But I am looking forward to some discussion about race on the ATFR. Shit, they’re bringing on a very qualified black host. If they don’t let Emmanuel do what he does, they will have totally wasted him in that role.
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Hi Steve,

My comment first: I don’t know what happens behind the scenes, but for me as a viewer, I thought that Clare/Tayshia and Matt had very diverse casts. With them and the upcoming season’s men for Paradise, I thought they were on track for an equal split for the Paradise cast in terms of diversity. I was looking forward to watching that show.

My question: Production for the show must be a huge enterprise. How many people do they have filming the show in total, traveling with production, and how many people did they have in their covid bubble? Do the crew usually stay at the same hotel or do they rent other rooms for them elsewhere?

Thanks!

Comment: I think it’s around 200 total. And where crew stays depends on where they are. Clearly for these COVID Bubble seasons, everyone was at the same place. In the past, most crew is at a different place, while some crew members have to be with the cast or else they’d just take off and do what they want.
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Where can I sign the petition for Mark Walberg as new Bachelor host?

Love home, love him, love him.

Comment: He’s awesome. Ashley says I fangirl over him. I couldn’t agree more. I absolutely do because I think he’s excellent at what he does for the show he’s on.
_____________________

Hey Steve,

Thank you for all you do. I have a couple of questions to ask.

1. On one of your lives with Ashley you alluded to drama behind the scenes with Katie that we were never shown. Between this and one of the contestants saying they expected Katie to be the villain. What are we missing here? All I’ve heard is that the what was shown wasn’t necessarily how it was. BUT, I don’t have any examples. You can see some of the women speak out against her on IG after the WTA. There’s quite a few things being said on IG, but one main thing I keep in comments is her Sarah conversation and how it played in the house is much different than how it played on screen. But still no details.

2. Do you not think Michelle is getting the bachelorette edit? She’s been featured in the credits twice in a row and is getting that “falling deeply in love is about to be heartbroken”. Could it be the bachelorette edit or could it be setting Matt up to get back with Michelle at AFTR? I think you could’ve made a case for Katie, Pieper, Abigail, and Serena P. ALL getting “Bachelorette” edits at the WTA. So I expect it’s one of them, and adding in Bri and Michelle (minus Katie).

3. Is there a chance Rachael will ask to get Matt back? I’m quite surprised he broke up with her because at the start he defended her. Not from what I’m hearing. He’s done with her and done with the show. Just wants to move on.

4. Did you hear Kiarra (from Peter’s season) talk about Rachael? She basically said she has mutual friends with her and the things she’s heard about her are not great.

Comment: No, haven’t heard about Kiarra. I hope when she said this she provided receipts, or else, it’s another she said/she said game.
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Hi Steve,

Keep up the good work. With all the Bachelor Nation drama, I have been riveted to your site.

I like Matt, but I totally agree with what you wrote about him doing the show for clout. Nothing about this man’s life as posted on social media says, “I’m looking to settle down with a wife or even a serious girlfriend.” lol

When he’s not working or doing charity programs, he seems more into partying, skateboarding, biking, boating, eating junk food, and hanging out with his bros, especially his bestie bro Tyler. Nothing wrong with this, if he’s not hurting anyone.

But no way, is this dude going to give up all that because he seems perfectly happy with the setup. The lifestyle is very much like a frat boy pushing 30. A serious relationship means that significant other would and should come before bros. I just don’t see that happening any time soon. However, he is certainly not the first to do the show to raise a profile. I actually think a good number of them are thinking about influencer sponsored content, podcaster money, and free goodies/ trips (pre-Covid) when the gig is over.

The show has moved so far from its roots. Before social media was popular, clout chasing didn’t seem to be as rampant. A shot at Dancing with the Stars was as good as it could get. I recall Kaitlyn B. initially had problems getting permission to do DWTS or something along those lines. I’m not sure what the reasoning was at the time, but Kaitlyn finally got her DWTS gig. Years later. She sure waited long enough!

My question to you is this. Do you think clout chasing has ruined the show or just changed it? Do you think the show could get back to its earlier roots if cast members were required to sign a contract that wouldn’t allow them to do sponsored content for at least a year after doing the show? After a year, their popularity might have cooled with new cast members getting most of the spotlight. This would certainly weed out the impatient ones. Do you think such a clause in the contract would be fair? I’ve read only the lead gets paid to do the show. Thoughts? Good question. I’d lean more towards ruined, just because it’s impossible to take any of these contestants seriously when they say they’re there for love. We know why you’re there. Love is like 87th on the list.

Second question. If the show seriously wanted to make a change, why are earth did the producers anoint Katie so early and give her the best edit when they had the most diverse cast ever? Surely others in the cast had the likeable personality to make good TV, but we didn’t get to see them as much. Michelle and a few others come to mind. The ham-handed cast- Katie-quick move makes them look extremely disingenuous.

Comment: Because production has made mistake after mistake after mistake this season. That was just another one in a long laundry list.
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Hello Reality Steve,

How’s it going?

Uh…. the weather has been crazy lately, huh?

Alright enough chit chat.

I’ve watched a few seasons of the bachelor/bachelorette. I stopped with Peter because he was kind of sleazy, jumped back in with the Bachelorette(s) and now Matt James.

I don’t know if it’s just me or what but it doesnt really seem like we “get to know” Matt James this season. Part of the fun with The bachelor/bachelorette is “getting to know them” with the contestants and buying into this made-up romance.

I feel like all I know about Matt is that bro time is really important to him and that he’s the first black bachelor. And if he’s not that into you you’ll stay home and bake cookies or hang out with Tyler c. I know more about the contestants like Victoria, Abigail, and Katie than Matt and he’s supposed to be the star of the show.

Is this different from past seasons? Are they giving him less attention and screen time? Did I just miss it?

If we are talking about inclusion and giving time to the stories of BIPOC why isn’t there more focus on Matt James and his story.

Cool. Cool cool cool.

Bye.

Comment: No, it’s more that we’re not used to having a lead brought in that we’ve never seen on our screen before. And we’re learning as we go. At least that’s the way I see it.
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Hi Steve!

First time writing an email, but I had something on my mind and I wondered what you might think.

While I completely condemn all acts of racism (explicit, implicit, not being an anti-racist), I do believe that Rachael is being made into some sort of crazy racist monster. Of course what she did was so wrong and she should 100% apologize, own up to it and do better, but seeing the way that bachelor nation and tabloids are talking about this really does make me feel a little sorry for her. Like she said, her racism and ignorance has no excuse, but I am sure that there are things from every person’s past that they would be ashamed of if it ever got out. And for Rachael, these mistakes from her past are being put on every headline of every news article talking about Bachelor news. People are reacting as though she is an extremely racist person to her core, and send her death threats, make memes of her falling out of the sky, and much more.

Just to be clear, I really do believe that any acts of implicit racism is very wrong and perpetuates the cycle of racist thoughts and ignorance, however I can’t help it but feel sorry for her and imagine how it might feel for her. Her acts of racism were hurtful and disappointing, but the overkill from the media and (as you like to call it) toxic bachelor nation only fuel the fire for people who think what Rachael did was never wrong in the first place. I do wish she could move on and begin to focus her energy on anti-racist actions, but I cannot see how she will when she feels like the 2nd most hated person in America right now (1st being CH).

Do you think I’m missing the point? I just can’t see how making Rachael out into a racist monster helps anyone. Let me know what you think. Thanks for all you do!

Comment: No, I see what you’re saying. Rachael’s not a crazy racist monster. She had some incredibly ignorant and racist beliefs online, but, every since any of this has come out, all I’ve seen is someone who has laid low, hasn’t made excuses, and is willing to learn. That’s all anyone can ask. She needs to be held accountable, and so far, she released a statement, then a 7 ½ min video about what she did that I thought was well done. Again, didn’t make excuses, didn’t explain herself, and told people to stop defending her. Which became humorous when her comments under that video were filled with a bunch of Karen’s saying “You have nothing to apologize for.” She’s just at the very beginning of this journey. She’s by no means being close to being out of the woods yet. But some of the language being used against her online is so hateful and just wrong, it’s sad.
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Steve,

You may have already answered this and I missed it. Have you wanted the Tony Parker documentary on Netflix? It was so good… I guess I am a bit biased being a crazy Spurs fan. Kobe speaks in it… and that sent chills up my spine. Just wanted to give a suggestion to a fellow basketball fan! Keep up the great work!!

Comment: No, I didn’t even know he had one. Gotta check it out. Does it address his alleged hookups with teammates wives? Oops. Too soon?
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Hiya,

I see this every season on your site and always wonder and never ask. Would you mind explaining what it means when you say “5.1 mil watched (1.2 rating”? What does the rating mean? I remember you sometimes broke it down by age group but I don’t quite understand if 1.2 means good or bad. Is it out of something? Is it a ratio? Help?

Comment: Found this to best answer your question:

“An important thing to know about Nielson ratings is that they are based on statistical sampling and are not a comprehensive measure of every person watching TV in America. According to Nielson, there are 120.6 million TV households in the United States, but only around 46,000 are sampled. The numbers reported are estimates of the 120.6 households based on the viewing habits of the sample population.

These TV ratings help calculate how much a network can charge advertisers for airtime during specific programs. One of the most important pieces of data used to determine ad pricing is the adults 18-49 rating share.

-Adults ages 18-49 are known as the key demographic because advertisers believe they have the most disposable income and least brand loyalty, which may make them more susceptible to advertising.
-Rating is the percentage of total TV households tuned into a program at a given time. So if a show has a 1.0 rating, it means that 1% of those 120.6 million households watched that program. This number is always out of the total estimated TV households and does not factor how many of those total households actually had their TVs on.”
_____________________

Steve,

I have hesitated writing, and you are probably going to disagree with everything I’m going to say here. And that is totally fine, because that’s what public discourse is all about.

I’m a romantic and so, despite all of its flaws, which are myriad, I have watched the Bachelor/ette seasons because I like happily-ever-afters, even if they ultimately end after the show finishes airing. But I’m done with the franchise, but not for the reason you might think.

It’s easy to say that all of these contestants signed up for the show and whatever they get, they had it coming, in one way or another. But, as a mom and grandmother, I grieve for all of these young people and even their families who are thrashed in social media and have their lives turned upside down and even ruined because of a woke mentality and demanding cancel culture that is growing bolder every day.

When my older brother was four years old, he and my mother were visiting my grandmother, and he was curiously investigating my grandmother’s trinkets and knickknacks in her living room. My mother was fretting and cautioning him over and over not to touch things. My grandmother finally looked at my mom and said, “Now, Beth. He’s only four years old. He doesn’t know EVERYTHING yet.” I have told and tell that to my kids all the time, substituting in the appropriate age, when they have needed or need to be less judgmental of others, or even of themselves.

So, Rachel Lindsay knew she was going on a show that had been predominantly white. She was the first Bachelorette of color, which was monumental and well-deserved. She found her husband on the show. He’s white. He may be from South America, but anyone looking at him will assume he’s white. The show gave her a huge national platform she probably wouldn’t otherwise have. But she has basically thrown the show that gave her that platform (however flawed the show is) under the bus.

Matt James knew he was going on a show that had been predominantly white. There were a lot of beautiful girls of color on his season. If your spoiler is correct, he chose a white girl, who has been accused of “vicious racism” because she went to a college party with an Antebellum theme. Girls who are twenty are thinking about pretty dresses and looking good for handsome guys and not social racial optics. Bad choice? Undoubtedly. But she was only twenty years old and didn’t “know everything yet.” Interestingly, this racist with her—horror!—Republican parents didn’t seem to have any problem falling completely in love with a black man. Sound racist?

Matt didn’t seem to have any problem signing his own contract to be on the show. He also didn’t seem to have any problem encouraging a masseuse to subject his BFF to sexual assault on national TV. Anyone calling him out for egging on a sexual assault? Do you think if the tables had been turned and a male masseuse had been asked to tweak the nipples of a female or mount her suggestively it would fly? The strip dates on the show have gotten bad enough, but this was too far. Governor Cuomo is taking a beating right now, not only for the nursing home scandal, but because he full-mouth kissed an aide without her permission and they’re calling it sexual assault. What the masseuse did was worse, in my opinion. Tyler was basically naked and vulnerable on a massage table.

Chris Harrison seems to have had a good relationship with the contestants on the show, and, as its spokesperson, was undoubtedly trying his best to strike middle ground when Rachel Lindsay asked him about the Rachael Kirkconnell situation. He stepped in it, sure, but do you really think he wasn’t trying to help people see both sides and find a place of reason? He’s only [I don’t know how old he is] and he doesn’t know everything yet, especially in our current state of racial tension. It’s actually new territory for most white people, at least at the level we are finding ourselves at now. But there is no learning curve. For anyone.

There is too much anger and judgment in the world and not enough level discourse and forgiveness, especially for past offenses. People spend too much time dredging up old things to damage people’s lives and claim the moral high ground, depending on their political/social position. Has Gov. Northam of Virginia, who wore blackface in college, been removed from office? Has the comic from SNL who told an anti-Jewish joke this weekend been kicked off the show? I could give you other examples of double-standards that exist, but this email is long enough..

There was a woman whom men had caught in adultery and were demanding that she be stoned. Jesus showed up, quietly listening, and when they asked for His opinion He said, “He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her.” The men, feeling guilty and uncomfortable, left. Jesus asked the woman where her accusers were. “Hath no man condemned thee?” He asked. When she answered no, He said, “Neither do I condemn thee; go, and sin no more.” Jesus didn’t give her a free pass—He told her not to sin anymore. But this also points that the men who’d accused her weren’t without their own set of sins that could easily be brought to light for condemnation.

We could all do with a little less self-righteousness and judgment, and a little more understanding, dialog, and forgiveness.

In the meantime, I’ve handed out my last rose.

Comment: Bye.

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23 Comments

23 Comments

  1. progressive4ever

    March 3, 2021 at 9:13 AM

    Regarding the comment where your response was simply Bye: I stopped reading at the words “woke” and “cancel culture,” terms adopted by the right wing when people are held accountable for their words or actions. These people don’t get it and never will because they Just. Don’t. Care. Thank you for using your platform to bring awareness.

  2. mgb970

    March 3, 2021 at 10:16 AM

    @ progressive4everMarch

    > the words “woke” and “cancel culture,” terms adopted by the right wing

    Thats a ridiculous take. People or groups don’t own words. If you’re going to attack something, attack that email rather than slandering half the country.

    You may also wish to extract yourself from that echo chamber you’re trapped in.

  3. angelfish

    March 3, 2021 at 10:45 AM

    It is beyond ridiculous to try & keep up with all these new “buzz phrases”. Like Progressive4ever, as soon as I see the words “woke” “cancel culture”, “receipts”, and now “do the work”, I move on. Do these people not realize how stupid all these nonsense phrases are sounding? Yes, the rise of social media has spawned the need to basically type in code to save space, but using 6 words when 2 will do is just idiotic. And so little of it makes any sense.
    Tl;dr for most of these letters. Steve has unbelievable patience.

  4. deedadoo

    March 3, 2021 at 1:48 PM

    I liked how you responded to the majority of this concerning Taylor, def a step in the right direction. I appreciate it. The part that’s muddy for me is your comments I keep seeing about “hate for hate.” (On the live and on here) Talking about wanting justice and her to lose her license isn’t hate or relishing in someone’s downfall. That couldn’t be further from the truth. To me, what’s always bothered me about her is I felt like her comments were taking us steps back in terms of racial issues because of the divisive nature and hate on stances she held. Add the fact that she’s a therapist and coaching vulnerable people who seek help, it’s alarming. Someone could have been on the verge of contemplating suicide and ran across her tweets and that might have been the final push. I got my degree in mental health and it’s at the heart of what I do. I have felt super strongly about this and then this came out. I think it’s important to call it what it is. By you saying “hate for hate” I think that’s super inaccurate and you’re totally missing the point and almost downplaying it. I’m not rejoicing in what happened but I am relieved because of the concerns I have had for a long time. Have you ever asked yourself why people have the feelings they do against her? It’s not some conspiracy against Taylor. This isn’t because of “white supremacy” and “silencing the black woman.” There’s a reason, dig deeper.

  5. kr211

    March 3, 2021 at 2:02 PM

    I whole heartedly agreed with this email and think it was thoughtfully and eloquently written. The fact that you stopped reading it over a few buzz words and all Reality Steve could respond with was “bye” tells me you arent ready to face your own hypocrisy.

    Reality Steve – the fact that you would even attempt to defend your friend Taylor, but havent considered perhaps Chris was attempting to do the same with Rachel, confirms that you *really* need to reread the story about Jesus. And maybe take a lesson or 2 before your own past mistakes are brought to light. Because we can find them.

  6. kr211

    March 3, 2021 at 2:04 PM

    exactly! if a large amount of people are ding dong the witch is dead’ing over your grave, there’s usually a valid reason.

  7. GoingBlonde

    March 3, 2021 at 2:09 PM

    The ones who scream the loudest calling everyone racist to the point it loses meaning are usually the ones with the most skeletons in their closet. I for one, am kinda glad this all came out about Taylor. Shuts her up for a while and maybe hopefully for good. No need to hear her nastiness any longer.

  8. deedadoo

    March 3, 2021 at 2:10 PM

    Right! And as much as taylor wants to believe “this is what happens when you challenge white supremacy”- yeah, that’s a no for me, dawg. Nice try, though!

  9. kr211

    March 3, 2021 at 2:10 PM

    Hasnt Chris publicly apologized to Rachel twice now? That’s not good enough for you but Taylor’s defensive, deflective, excuse-ridden “apologies” were and we all just need to leave her alone now?

  10. GoingBlonde

    March 3, 2021 at 2:18 PM

    The fact that Steve could only conjure up Bye as a response to a well thought out email with very valid points shows he has no leg to stand on and is too lazy to do his own work in coming up with anything thoughtful to say. Pathetic.

  11. jaytee404

    March 3, 2021 at 6:10 PM

    Thank you for this Steve. To that long ass email you responded bye to. I’m so happy you did that because that means you saw right through her as I did as did progressive4ever.
    Though eloquently written, I can’t believe the ignorance in current events and all the defensiveness towards white supremacy. She basically defended Rachael k and Chris while blaming POC for going on the show, like wtf? Did I just read that? Rachael k was 21 years old in 2018, I made better decisions than her when I was 12. Anyone with sense or education knows how wrong that was. At 18 you’re a full grown person to comprehend how distasteful what she did was. Her racist actions do not mean she’s racist but she knew exactly what she was doing,she just didn’t care because guess what? She was in her circle with all her white Friends etc,, so she thought it was ok.As far as Chris goes, he poured gasoline on himself, lit the match and burned. No excuses at all for him at his age.
    The problem alot of white people are not understanding is wrong by using the term “woke police” ” cancel culture” is you’re basically saying why is everyone aware of these distasteful events happening, it was better when no one knew and poc were silenced and white supremacy was well and alive. That’s why it was a problem CH said it in the interview and when everyone else uses it to call people that are calling for CH and Rachael to do the work. Yes they apologized, that’s step # 1. Now we need to be shown step by step how they’ll do better. We are not canceling them or not forging them, we are holding them accountable and telling them to do better.

    As for Taylor, yes that is beyond messed up and sickening. She has been doing the work to be better and that’s why she is a therapist today and is passionate about anti racism and any form of bullying because she used to be that person. She was wrong for blaming white supremacy for what she was tweeting but was right in blaming white supremacy for why she hated herself and was bitter about who she was. My family is biracial and I know exactly what I’m talking about here. You can ask me anything and I’ll give you clear as day examples of what we go through.
    Taylor should have used her tweets to show us where she started and where she’s at now, but she never did and that’s where she lost credibility. Cats out the bag and now and it’s a disaster. A better apology and accountability is needed from her too as the 1st step and she needs to keep showing us how she can do better. All 3 were wrong and knew what they did. I see no 4 year Olds here. Even 6,7,8 year Olds know when they are doing something wrong. I was a nanny to a 6 year old who was gigling with her friend and whispering about the N word. When I called them to ask them why they said that, they explained and apologized because they knew how hurtful that word was.6 year Olds and they knew better, so why should we expect a 21 year old not to be aware of her actions?
    Majority of my friend’s and family are white too and guess what? At parties they use all the words Taylor has used and everyone is mad about and even the n word just because they know they are in their circles and I’m sure everyone here does and same goes for my black family members and friends. Heck I’ve used the R word myself but definitely not in Taylor’s context and anger.
    No one is a Saint here, the only difference is we are not in the spotlight and we don’t put our frustrations on Twitter like Taylor did.

  12. shenanigans

    March 4, 2021 at 6:34 AM

    I totally agree with GoingBlonde. The email message that Steve blew off with a simple “bye” was honest, well-reasoned, and totally on point. We are all at different places on this journey and should not be “cancelled” because we aren’t where other people think we SHOULD be. The lack of compassion and understanding that he showed that person was galling.

  13. justanopinion

    March 4, 2021 at 8:16 AM

    I think some people here need to really re-evaluate the depth of how disgusting Taylor’s comments were. The tone towards her in some of these comments versus Chris and Rachael is obvious. People say Rachael should know better because she was 18, and a few sentences later say that Taylor is a therapist today because of the hateful stuff she was saying?? What?? She was ALSO 18 and older when she made those comments. In fact she was already on her track to becoming a therapist when she made a good chunk of those comments. In fact she already HAD CLIENTS and made fun of them in her public tweets. She doesn’t get a pass, or an excuse to be treated more softly, just because she’s a person of color. I am also a person of color who struggled with self hatred at one point in my life and the evil vicious things she took the time to type out for the world to see are a problem. The more important issue here is that Taylor Nolan is a licensed therapist who has publicly broken the trust of her license. What she did is a thousand times more vile than anything Chris or Rachael did. Saying she’s ‘put in the work’ is such a bs excuse. If her intentions were true then she would have talked about these tweets long ago, rather than barking a defensive self-centered ‘apology’ and blaming white people for the hate in her heart. I am so tired of this narrative that the white people should be given higher criticism purely because of their race. Her ‘apology’ showed who she was. She is self-centered, self-serving, and self-righteous.

    At this point I don’t see how people don’t see how truly messed up this is. Please take race out of it and put things into perspective. Rachael made some bad choices and wore some offensive outfits. Chris Harrison talked over a woman and said the words woke police while asking for the world to wait to hear a response from Rachael. Taylor tweeted over 300 times about rape victims, people of colors, overweight people, people with mental and physical disorders. Ask yourself who REALLY deserves to be ‘cancelled’?

    Imagine leaving your therapists office and she TWEETS about you. It’s disgusting.

  14. tinyred500

    March 4, 2021 at 10:27 AM

    I so agree with your excellent comment.

    When dealing with any minority or diversity group and those within them. We shouldn’t be giving ‘anyone’ a free pass for poor or appalling behaviour. That’s why ‘all’ groups of people must be included in the discussion. It’s the only way to bring better understanding and over time…..changes.

  15. ju1ia

    March 4, 2021 at 11:16 AM

    Ok woke Steve, can you seriously stop pushing mark wahlberg as the new host? Are you not aware of the multiple hate crimes he’s been convicted of?? He threw rocks at black children chasing them and yelling “kill the n…..s ” TWICE. Years later he attacked two old Vietnamese men, physically beating them with a plank and calling them racial slurs. This is far worse than anything any bachelor contestant or host has done. Stay woke.

  16. nope

    March 4, 2021 at 11:42 AM

    Ok I just realized this is a different mark walberg (no H). I don’t watch temptation island, I take it back, I’m sorry!

  17. kayakguy

    March 4, 2021 at 2:29 PM

    Well said.

    Now need to find a way to binge watch bachelor Canada this weekend

  18. janiel

    March 4, 2021 at 4:31 PM

    Maybe someday you’ll grow up enough to realize that not everybody CARES what stories were written a couple thousand years ago about somebody who very likely never even existed, let alone was a deity.

    Keep your mythology for yourself. If it comforts you, that’s great. But there’s no reason to inflict it on the rest of us.

  19. janiel

    March 4, 2021 at 4:38 PM

    Of course groups don’t own words, but you can tell a lot about what somebody thinks based on who else tends to use the same language and in what contexts. For example, there is nothing *inherently* racist in the phrase “fourteen words,” but anybody who’s been paying attention knows that that phrase is code for a very *specific* set of fourteen words (“We must secure the existence of our people and a future for white children,”) that is a recognized slogan of the neo-Nazi movement. If somebody throws around the phrase “fourteen words” without a damn clear different context that makes it certain they’re simply ignorant of its coded meaning and not intending it that way, I will think they’re a Nazi and I’ll have excellent reason to.

    Groups don’t own words, but they do adopt them as their own and make it clear that the words mean that somebody is one of that group. If you can hear the phrase “make America great again” and not think the speaker is a Donald Trump fan, you’re simply naive.

  20. tiggertamer

    March 4, 2021 at 8:34 PM

    @janiel The person who wrote the e-mail I think you’re referring to stated that she’s a grandmother, so I doubt she’ll “grow up” much more than she already has, though we will all, hopefully, continue to grow.

    For the most part, I’m not a believer in religion or any deity so, when someone quotes religious scripture, I’m usually skeptical.

    However, proverbs, regardless of where they originate, usually contain words of wisdom “He who is without sin among you, let him be the first to throw a stone at her.” Compare with, “People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.” Both statements contain wisdom regarding similar situations. Words of wisdom, and the people who quote them, shouldn’t be dismissed just because the words originate from religious scripture.

    I don’t necessarily have the same overall viewpoint at the person who wrote the e-mail, but her message was well-written, respectful, and contained words of wisdom.

    I also appreciated your own words of wisdom in your subsequent post, regarding “fourteen words”. I learned something valuable from you in that post, and I thank you for that.

  21. shellylite

    March 4, 2021 at 11:39 PM

    There is so much wrong with the Bachelor but for that matter most reality shows. Most of them objectify women and I’m not sure I’d call it misogyny but there is rampant sexism in the Bachelor franchise. I think there has been a lot of diversity lately. If you start adding all the people you suggested then you have a different TV show entirely which is fine, but it’s a different product. Call it “Diversity Dating” but it would not be the Bachelor franchise anymore. What I have noticed about this show that bothers me so much lately is the canned phrases that everyone repeats. Calling the show a “journey” “my Journey” “I see you” “hard conversations” “for the right reasons” “authentic and vulnerable” and all the phrases that pop up over and over again, it’s like they are given a script but told to just use the words whenever they can fit them in. It’s so formulatic. The whole concept of everyone being there reciting their canned phrases and hoping a life-long marriage comes out of that is crazy. It’s so fake. I don’t think the audience even expects a proposal at the end anymore.
    Why should marriage even be the goal of the show when so many people don’t get married anymore?

    The Bachelor show(s) is just supposed to be mindless fluffy entertainment but it grew too big and now it’s a political statement. Worst of anything besides the anorexic women is how the male lead always calls them “girls” (Chris Harrison didn’t do that) and how they are nearly always in their 20s. What is wrong with women in their 30s and even 40s? Or 50s? Why does the show have to be so young, when young people probably aren’t even watching it?

    Why do they never eat a bite of food on their “dinner” dates? It’s all so fake and weird.

    I never saw a male lead fake-smile so much as Matt this season. He never looked like he was enjoying any of it.

    Maybe they should just trash the Bachelor/Bachelorette and just do the BIP shows. They are the most fun anyway.

  22. shellylite

    March 4, 2021 at 11:56 PM

    I agree, @justanopinion, Taylor Nolan has some real serious issues and shouldn’t be within a mile of a counseling or therapy job. She is way too off the grid to help anyone else reach any kind of feeling of “normal”. What she wrote on social media was so much worse than wearing bad outfits. I won’t defend RK because she doesn’t want us to defend her, but I don’t think any of her motives were actually racist, and I don’t think CH’s motives were either, but CH is definitely guilty of massive rudeness. He was trying to walk a fine line and defend his show’s “winner”, which is probably what they sent him out to do, and he did what so many other men on TV and radio do- he was rude to a woman, and he diminished her, and he talked over him. All men who do that should be publicly shamed? I don’t know, that would be pretty much all of them.

  23. idontcare

    March 7, 2021 at 3:26 AM

    Agreed. 100 percent. Why did Taylor get off so lightly. Why wasn’t she dragged to the dirt by Rachel Lindsey like Rachael K and Chris H? Do I smell prejudice here? How’s she make out so well when her “mistakes” lasted for years and the most vicious I’ve ever seen? Hmmm

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