Reality Steve

Reader Emails

“Reader Emails,” the “Bachelorette” TV Schedule, “Bachelor Party” Podcast, & Your Daily Roundup

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Hi Steve,

Before Kim, Pete dated:

Cazzie David
Ariana Grande
Kaia Gerber
Kate Beckinsale
Phoebe Dynevor

Those are the only ones I know of. Ahhhh yes, I forgot Cazzie and Kaia. Don’t know who Phoebe is. I tell you what though, that’s basically the 27’ Yankees lineup. Geez.

When I saw the TikTok a few weeks ago I had a feeling your story might be about Nate when you teased it on Monday morning. Maybe this can quell some of the “Nate for Bachelor” pleadings. Exceptional timeline and reporting. Ha ha, it basically had no effect. Nor was that the intention of it.

Gas stations in OC use to give Dodger memorabilia when you would fill up the tank. Union 76 maybe? The gasoline was more expensive but I would beg my parents to fill up there so I could get all the Dodger goodies; wristbands, photos, etc.

That is all.

Comment: I absolutely remember the Union 76 Stations that had like 8.5 x 11 photos of the current Dodger players at the time. Used to collect those religiously. That was at the height of Fernando-mania.


Thanks so much for your input and spoilers!

Re Logan switching, I don’t see it wrong, I agree with you 100%.
I did notice how Rachel was hoping Gabby would send him home and when he got the rose you could tell she was disappointed. True, she did the same thing with Hayden ?????

As far as the whole Nate news, thank U and the 2 women that came forward! You have more than enough receipts on this, WHAT could he possibly say that makes it ok. I read your info and hadn’t seen this weeks episode, when I did watch it I was sooo turned off by him! He still hasn’t answered the question, and probably won’t. He’s going to give the “I was coming off a divorce, I was being very careful about my dating…” nonsense. 1) Not really. Nothing careful about what either of those women shared. You love bombed them. Being careful would be taking things slow, not showering them with praise and saying the things you did. 2) And again, for the 1000th time, no one is questioning whether you should or shouldn’t have introduced them to your daughter. That’s your own discretion and everyone’s different. All I’m asking, and I think a lot of people are to, is how can you not even mention you had a daughter that you spent that much time with in 18 months? That’s all. Answer that question for the people. Sounds like he won’t, when, it really is a rather simple question to answer. If you HADN’T told Laree about your daughter within the first month, maybe then you could just give some BS “I don’t tell anyone I’m talking to/dating/hooking up with that I have one.” I’d still find it totally weird, but at least you’d be consistent. But to tell one girl you knew for a month but another girl you clearly talked to more, saw more, showered more with gifts, it’s just a giant head scratcher.

The people that fail to see how wrong this is should really take a look at their values. That was just right before coming on to the show!!!!! So he’s a changed man?!?! He was still married when he was dating the first girl, played them both but oh now he’s ready to fall in love and propose etc?!!??

I bet if Gabby knew about this during the show she would be “no way man, not interested in pursuing a relationship with you” that’s what some may not see! I like Gabby and hope he’s not the 4th guy!!

Gaby was so turned off by Clayton at the end she didn’t even let him walk her out! No way does she deserve a gut like Nate, PeriodT!
(I like Clayton, he was just in a tough spot)

Have a great week and a speedy recovery 🙂

Comment: I think most people, especially if he’s the Bachelor next season, honestly won’t care. Because we know the ulterior motives of all contestants, and finding their future spouse on the show is about 10th of the list of why they’re agreeing to be on the show. That’s just fact.

Hey Steve!

I am hoping that maybe you can go over this during a Daily Roundup, but if it’s something you have already discussed (that I missed) or would prefer to just answer as a reader email, no worries.

I started The Challenge USA a little bit late this season and am just confused about the change from MTV and whole new cast. Does this mean we are done with CT, Bananas, Tori Deal etc. and the Fessy of it all? I don’t mind the change, actually quite enjoying it, but just curious how this all came to be and if the MTV regulars feel slighted at all. Does MTV not own “The Challenge” concept or are the two channels owned by the same parent company or something? With TJ still hosting USA, there must be some sort of deal obviously, I’m just not clued in and hoping you can explain how it transpired and what the endgame is. Thank you!

Comment: No, there’s still an MTV Challenge with all your legends and favorites. Pretty sure the next season has already wrapped filming and I’m guessing will start airing on MTV once the CBS one ends. Or close to it. The MTV franchise isn’t going anywhere. It just looks like it’s being kept separate from CBS which will pull their contestants just from CBS shows.

Hey Steve!

Is there a reason Fleiss and the Bachelor are defending Nate so much after your story? It’s not a great look but like you said he’s a f*** boy it’s not like he did anything illegal. Could this be because he was a favorite to be the next Bachelor? It just seems like they are going hard to defend a guy that gets eliminated before hometowns.

Comment: Yes. They clearly want him, hence all the tweets last week. If he was someone they never considered or weren’t talking to, Fleiss wouldn’t have said a word and acknowledged me. Although, it is nice to feel like Roman Reigns once in a while.

Dear Reality Steve,

I listened to some of Juliet L’s podcast and I did not dig that vibe toward you. The Demi stuff she said was truly bizarre and then Claire or Emma or whichever monotoned cohost was referencing another podcast called “Date Pod” if something and intimating something. Bout you that is complete bull! Frustrating, I know.

When I went under once I was talking about Randy Johnson performing poorly for the Yankees and pitching E.R.A’s. They were saying “come on, count backward from ten.

Back to Juliet. I am not really sure why they turned on you but I feel there could be some jealousy because you get all the scoops! Triple scoop! Wooh! I have no idea what Juliet has against me. And whatever she does, she’s never messaged me or told me about it. I just hear about the shots she’s taken at me over the years and, you know, not much I can do. Well, except call out that garbage she spewed out last week.

That Clare or Emma said that you were not a journalist. Uggh. I stand by jealous. Ok. Enough of that. There’s a whole thing I get into in today’s Daily Roundup about that.

Now! Now! Now! I heard what you said about Dave and the Venmo. I signed up for Venmo on my train into Union Station. I did not have a debit card with me but now I am home and I will find your Venmo and I will Venmo you and you will be my first Venmo and you rock and just relax and heal and I will say that “She’s All Bach” is very nice and the two cohosts even direct people to your site to read everything about Nate and they credit you properly and they are not disparaging.

Well, Steve, I am glad you watch Big Brother even though it is hokey and campy and probably some of those competitions would have been on Nickelodeon in the 90”s.

I will definitely complete my Venmo stuff before I go see my band tomorrow night and Venmo within the next 24 hours. You rock. Take care of yourself. Heal. Bless.

Comment: Thank you for any donation, and thank anyone who donated through Dave’s promotion. Trust me. Door Dash thanks you as well.

Hi Steve,

Glad your surgery went well. Praying for speedy recovery. Thank you for all that you do on this site and keeping us in the know as much as you can. I for one appreciate that you do not “run” with a story before you have confirmation. it shows integrity. Thanks. Definitely made mistakes in the past. Have changed those since. Gets frustrating when that’s not acknowledged and I’m just stuck with a label of “he’s that guy who ruined Jenna.” Personally, I think if you’re going to say that, which you have every right to because I did, but if you say that and STOP there – I’m sorry but that’s not the full story and you clearly have a negative impression of me and you’re refusing to acknowledge I’ve tried to do anything to change it. How come after the, “I can’t believe he did that to Jenna,” it isn’t followed up with, “Yes, but he admitted his mistake, took full responsibility for it, had her on the podcast for 2 hours to talk it out, deleted everything about the story, and publicly and privately apologized to her?” Seems like some people just want to stick to an old narrative, but in that case, to leave the second part out is just being a troll, honestly. It’s like people can’t/won’t/are afraid to just say, “Wow, he learned his lesson and doesn’t do that anymore.” Is that so hard?

Lets not also forget, this was the first negative story in 15 months that I posted about ANYONE in the franchise. And I easily could’ve done more considering how much stuff has been told to me. I could’ve done it recklessly with no evidence/receipts and just said, “this is what I’m hearing.” You know, like the IG and TikTok accounts do. It’s like people are taking 2010-2018 me and saying what’s happening now and is still the same. Sorry, but that’s flat out factually incorrect. The track record proves that. Find me one negative story I’ve posted in the last 15 months. Hasn’t happened. Nor will it unless people are willing to put their names behind it and show proof.

Hi steve,

I’ve got a few questions for you. Was the Nate story the teased story that it was ‘the biggest one you’ve ever done’ that was supposed to come out in August? Or is that a completely different story? Completely different story. And hey guess what? The next one is about a white guy! So what will the narrative be now, Emma and Juliet, since you’re clearly keeping track? How sad.

Will you and sharleen do a podcast again? Or Whit and Ry? I would hope to.

Im curious over who is the new ‘Elan’ of the bachelor producers who is calling most of the shots? I know the names of the main ones but I don’t know if someone has filled in for his particular role.

Im curious for your thoughts on the chatty broad coverage of your Nate story?

Comment: I mean, I’m glad they actually could set aside things that happened in the past and compartmentalize this story vs older ones. Wish more people knew how to do that.


Do you still plan on dropping a big story this month and if so, when do you think it will come out? I’m not sure when it’ll come out. But it will happen. You’ll maybe know why once it drops in terms of what took so long and the vetting that needed to be done. Not to mention, the serious nature of it. However, not gonna lie, the Nate story, spoilers, and MTA spoilers basically had me do nothing towards that story all last week. So I’ve picked it up again this week.

When Gabby and Rachel said they didn’t feel that the show pitted them against each other but that the fans did, do you agree with that? I feel like the two of them pitted themselves against each other (both of them seem to feel insecure about the other one being there – Rachel as we see literally every week, Gabby thinking she’s the “rough around the edges” Bachelorette) more than anything. I guess anytime you have two women, there’s always gonna be some comparing. I think there’s a difference between “comparing” and “pitting,” no? Pitting has such a negative connotation to it. Nobody wins here if ones relationship lasts longer, or someone’s ring is better/bigger, etc.

From what you’ve heard (I don’t know if you get info like this) do you think Logan stood a chance with Gabby if he hadn’t gotten COVID? It doesn’t sound like it, but I guess we’ll never know.

I’m listening to today’s (Monday’s) podcast as I type. The Nate thing obviously and clearly ties back to you. When you say “I let them tell their story on my website” that’s one thing, but you also tweeted promoting it, podcasted promoting it, profited off of it with the ads on your website, gave your opinion, and hyped the story up. And as long as you keep bringing it up, defending it, etc., you still profit off of it, therefore you have skin in the game. To boil it down to “I let them tell their story on my website” is irresponsible of you. Of course people are tying your name into the story. You have an agenda to profit off the story.

Hope you at least understand where I come from whether you agree or not. I’m just looking for accountability I guess.

Comment: Yeah, I don’t understand that at all. Of course I’m going to promote it, tweet it, talk about it, etc. Any writer or podcaster who doesn’t post and promote something they just podcasted or wrote would be foolish. You’re bothered I monetize what I do? Then I’d suggest never reading anything on the internet ever again. We’re all monetizing what we do. That’s not the story. I was saying that I’m not the story because Emma and Juliet turned WHAT I reported about ME, not the actual content. Too much time spent talking about my role in things, when that wasn’t the focal point of the story. Hell, it wasn’t ANY point of the story. You lost me on that last paragraph.


Can you please help me understand why ABC seems ready to die on a hill defending Nate? I just don’t get it. There’s been TONS of contestants (and leads if we are being honest) before him who have come out with scandals/facts that are not a good look, and 99% of the time it’s crickets from production. Shoot, we heard less from ABC when none other than Chris Harrison made the choices he did. But for Nate, Mike Fleiss writes a Twitter dissertation and production attempts serious damage control? Your guess is as good as mine. I mean, lets not beat around the bush, they completely blew it the one and only time they had a black male lead with Matt James, so this could absolutely be them trying to correct themselves for how they handled that season. And the fact that he’s a father on top of that? We haven’t seen a single father lead on this show since Mesnick in 2009. UPDATE: I blanked on Juan Pablo. He was the last single dad lead. That season aired 8 years ago in 2014. I’d say those are two pretty strong reasons.

I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m not on the hate-Nate train. I don’t think he’s a bad guy, just made some shady choices. But am I missing something here? Is he really THAT special in Bachelor production?

Do you really think they are doing all this because they want him as the next bachelor? I honestly cannot think of any other logical reason. Please, help me understand.

Comment: It doesn’t really have to be someone all that special. Trust me, when Ben was announced, and Sean was announced, and Chris Soules was announced – the list goes on – it’s not like everyone was jumping up and down applauding them for finally making the right decision. Nate would be no different than any other past lead getting announced. Plenty will like him, plenty won’t. While he does have a negative story attached to him, men in this franchise can get past something like that WAAAAAAY easier than the women do, and that’s just a fact.

Hey Steve-

On Big Brother, I’m trying to determine which is more lame – giving oneself a generic name like DJ Showtime or speaking about oneself in the 3rd person with that name. To side with Nicole and Daniel and then approach Taylor was pretty ballsy though. I don’t think Terrence is long for this game.

I don’t know what to make of Daniel’s exit. Bitter and nasty in the house and then seeming to have a sense of humor about it with Julie and in the farewell messages where it was pretty clear people did not like him and thought his game sucked. I wish Julie asked him what the lie Taylor said about Paloma was. Wait until he watches it back. I’m guessing Paloma is a no show at the finale and will be excluded from America’s favorite player choices. It was a good laugh when Daniel said he and Taylor were good, followed by her video. Start memorizing that apology Elvis impersonator. I listened to a couple Daniel post-eviction interviews and he seems to forget a lot of what he said/did on the live feeds. Maybe when he watches it back we’ll get a long IG post from him on his behavior.

I think these racially-based decisions like Taylor not being willing to put a black woman up for eviction (even though that woman has been against her the whole time) will break up alliances and increase distrust of POC on these shows by white contestants.

Comment: It’s possible, but we’re only one season removed from the Cookout. I feel like it’ll take 3, 4, 5 seasons of seeing how POC play the game and if every season we’re getting, “I don’t wanna vote out any black men/women,” then I could say maybe there’ll be some distrust there. Too early to say now. The Taylor bullying and the things that were said about her I think were way worse than her stance of not wanting to vote out a black woman.


As a member of the pit, I must correct one thing in your column this morning. Credit for the love levels does not go to Sharlene. Love levels were invented by Chad Kultgen and Lizzy Pace, who have a podcast called the Game of Roses and also wrote the book called “How to Win the Bachelor”.

They are:

Level 1: “You’re super hot and I’m
attracted to you.
(Various iterations
of this sentiment are acceptable.)
Level 2: “I feel myself starting to get
feelings for you.”
Level 3: “I can see myself falling in
love with you.”
Level 4: “I’m falling in love with
Level 5: “I’m in love with you.”
Level 6: “I love you.”

In their book, along with the love levels, are specific instructions on how to use them. You cannot be in love with the lead without first envisioning yourself in love with them. In addition to saying the love levels in the right order, you must know when to say them. Otherwise, you will be disqualified for “not being there for the right reasons”.

Comment: Well, just so you know, Sharleen was writing recaps long before GOR was a thing. I love GOR as a brand and they’ve been guests on the podcast numerous times. I’m just saying they haven’t been around as long as Sharleen and she’s ALWAYS talked about this every season. Now, I don’t think she has 6 labels, but just the concept of how someone is expressing love? Yeah, she’s been doing that for years. Well before GOR was podcasting. This is no shade on GOR, but their first podcast was April 23rd of 2020. Sharleen was around years before that in her blog talking about the different ways people say “love” on this show. Those are just facts.

Hi Steve,

You mentioned the logistics around Logan’s covid diagnosis and how everyone in the cast and production has been vaccinated with no one else impacted. Aside from Logan, and given “the too numerous to count” breakthrough cases of Covid with 2-4 injections, will you be changing your position for the next annual party to include everyone regardless of status? By your own admission the CDC guidance has been lackluster and there is a lot of data out there that it does nothing to stop the spread. Barring anything crazy like another major variant breaking out, or Vegas going to a mask mandate, no, I doubt I’ll have a vaccine mandate next party. Hell, the CDC basically said vaxxed and unvaxxed are treated the same now. So as long as that’s still in place come next June, I think it’ll be open to anyone again. I never thought it would be a long term thing. I just can’t predict the future with viruses, so, that’s my answer in August 2022. We’ll see how things are June of next year.

Show wise, I do not foresee them doing co-leads ever again. It did not remotely come close to the success of Joe Millionaire in terms of organic connection. But I don’t think either of these women could have carried the show solo, much as I like them as people.

Comment: Yeah, it’s kind of a tough thing to say just because it didn’t happen. I mean, the lead doesn’t really have to carry the show necessarily anyway, per se. The show is made by the contestants. Always has and always will be. The lead just has to be there along for the ride.

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  1. jlal

    August 17, 2022 at 8:08 AM

    I agree with many of the emails that there hasn’t been enough time to develop any relationships. Unless the leads are getting time with the guys outside of what we’re shown, I don’t get how anyone could have true deep feelings. There have been so few one on one dates and canceled dates and parties, I wonder how either women and the men even know each other at all.

  2. ctrealitygirl

    August 17, 2022 at 9:10 AM

    I wholly agree with you jlal. Watching the show on Monday I found it difficult to believe that Gabby had a connection with any of her remaining men that was strong enough to warrant an engagement. All along, I felt the only one she seemed to have any chemistry with was Nate. It kind of reminds me of Desiree’s season when it was obvious she was so head-over-heels in love with Brooks. She’s seemed broken after her break-up date with Nate. The only other guy she expressed being drawn to was Jason, but evidently he leaves on his own accord? I just don’t see a connection with her and Erich at all. That engagement surely won’t last. At least with Rachel we’re some valid connections, mostly with Tino and Zach, but t least her ending seems plausible. I feel badly for Gabby. Seems like she drew the short straw this season. She’s has so many setbacks and many cancelled dates/cocktail parties. It’s a shame. I really enjoyed the first couple episodes with the two women interacting more. Once they split up the guys and separated, the show started to seem so disjointed. Let’s face it, it’s a big enough stretch believing an engagement can take place for a single lead over the course of an 8-week season, with two 1-on-1 dates every episode and one group date. How the heck can they develop strong feeling having one 1-on-1 date each week??

  3. justsaying

    August 17, 2022 at 11:34 AM

    Don’t forget the part stink was cussing out the producers when he didn’t get the group date rose. Scary!

  4. justsaying

    August 17, 2022 at 11:37 AM

    I mean Tino (not stink lol)

  5. irisvioletgrey4

    August 18, 2022 at 1:06 PM

    Yes, his sense of entitlement was chilling. That’s not going to go down well with Rachel when she starts seeing it because she seems to have healthy boundaries.

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